Sunday, May 13, 2007

Rubber chicken, with a side order of Hypocrisy

So as part of my job, I'm often required to attend these bizarre charity functions where five hundred or so Hollywood types are forced to sit around tables full of pre-made, sun-lamp warmed, dinner theatre-style entrees so that some organization or another can hit them up for donations while providing "entertainment" of varying quality. They usually last about three hours and you can hear the groans up-and-down the hallways when the call goes out that attendees are needed to fill the company table.

I don't really mind going to these. Once you get past the 45-minute valet line (I street park whenever possible), what's to complain about when it comes to a free meal and a few glasses of wine with the occassional interesting performance thrown in?Last night, for instance, Robin Williams did a chaotic but funny 30 minute set that had the audience rolling. And I once saw Jessica Simpson, Christopher Cross, and Randy Newman on the same bill... which is about as fantastic a mis-match as I've seen outside the casting of FREEJACK (go look it up).

But here's what annoyed me. One of the sponsors of the event was the National Resource Defense Council... and so, much of the night included platitudes from the likes of Leonardo Di Caprio, who assured us that we were all "good citizens of the planet" for supporting such a worthy cause.

Fine.

Come on out to the valet line with me Leo, and let's take a few minutes to watch the parade of Hummers, Ferraris, and Lotus lethal weapons zooming by on their way to this or that 10,000 square foot mansion.

I mean really, can't we have SOME level of self-awareness in this town?

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